When Behaviour Speaks: How Language Difficulties Drive Behaviour Problems in Children

Behaviour problems such as tantrums, aggression, withdrawal, or inattentiveness are often the first signs noticed by parents and educators. Yet what frequently goes unnoticed is that these behaviours can be symptoms of deeper difficulties with language.

Language difficulties are a powerful underlying cause of many behavioural concer

ns. When children struggle to understand or use language effectively, frustration builds and that frustration often shows up as behaviours that disrupt classrooms, playgrounds, and homes.

The Strong Link Between Language Difficulties and Behaviour Problems

Longitudinal studies show that children with language difficulties are significantly more likely to experience emotional and behavioural challenges than their peers. For instance, one study found that children with persistent language difficulties scored higher than their peers on measures of hyperactivity, inattention, peer problems, conduct issues, and emotional symptoms at ages 7-9 and 11-13 (Helland et al., 2022). Boys with ongoing language difficulties tended to show more pronounced behavioural challenges, while girls reported more emotional difficulties.​

In clinical and community samples, approximately 70% of children with emotional or behavioural disorders also have language deficits, particularly in expressive, receptive, and pragmatic (social) language skills (Benner, 2002; Levickis et al., 2017). Common problem behaviours such as withdrawal, attention difficulties, aggression, and social anxiety are common among these children (Jansen et al., 2020).​

Pragmatic language difficulties, where children struggle with the social use of language such as taking turns, understanding humour, or interacting with peers, are strongly linked to anxiety and externalizing behaviours, sometimes more so than structural language problems (Helland, 2014). Limited social communication increases the risk of peer difficulties and hyperactivity, further affecting behaviour and emotional well-being (Roy & Chiat, 2014).​

Examples of Language Driven Behaviour Challenges

Understanding what these language difficulties look like in everyday situations helps educators and parents respond with greater insight and compassion:

• Expressive Language Struggles “I Can’t Say It” : Some children have difficulty putting their thoughts and needs into words. They may know exactly what they want to say but cannot find the right words of form complete sentences. This communication gap can lead to frustration, which sometimes shows up as yelling, tantrums, or refusal to participate. For example, a child who wants to say "I'm hurt" might instead scream or push others. At school, this child may remain silent during discussions out of fear of being misunderstood, a behaviour that teachers might mistake for defiance or lack of interest.

  
  

• Receptive Language Difficulties “I Don’t Understand” : These children struggle to comprehend spoken or written instructions. A teacher's complex request like "Please put your books away and line up quietly" might be confusing, resulting in non-compliance that looks like willful disobedience. Similarly, at home, children might ignore or misinterpret parental requests, leading to misunderstandings and frustration that erupt as behaviour problems.

  
  

• Social (Pragmatic) Language Deficits “I Don’t Get the Rules” : Social communication, or pragmatic language, involves using language appropriately in social contexts such as taking turns in conversations, understanding jokes or sarcasm, interpreting facial expressions, and adjusting language to fit different situations. Children who struggle with these skills often miss social cues or have trouble joining group conversations. As a result, they may be excluded by peer groups or viewed as rude. On the playground, these children may not grasp the unwritten rules of games, respond in unexpected ways, or interrupt others. Such misunderstandings can lead to social isolation and, at times, reactive aggression or withdrawal.

  
  

• Academic Language Barriers “School Is Hard” : Beyond everyday conversation, children must also understand and use the more complex language of school subjects such as math, science, and literature. Difficulties with vocabulary, grammar, and abstract concepts can interfere with reading comprehension, writing, or trouble grasping explanations. Difficulties with vocabulary, grammar, and abstract concepts can interfere with reading comprehension, writing, and classroom explanations. When children struggle with academic language, they may act out from frustration or confusion, appear inattentive, or become anxious about schoolwork. Over time, these experiences can create a negative cycle of disengagement and disruptive behaviour.

  
  

Why Behaviour Follows Language Difficulties

When language fails, behaviour often becomes a child’s way of communicating. Tantrums, withdrawal, aggression, and inattentiveness can reflect frustration, misunderstanding, or social exclusion rooted in language challenges. Research shows that children who can express their needs intentionally tend to display fewer behavioural problems than those who cannot, even when their overall language skills remain limited (Jansen et al., 2020).​

Overlooking these underlying language difficulties can lead to disciplinary responses that miss the true cause. Behaviour management strategies alone rarely succeed when a child's ability to communicate is compromised.

The Need for Early Identification and Intervention

Given the strong evidence, early screening for expressive, receptive, and pragmatic language difficulites must be a priority. Early speech language therapy, targeted language interventions, and curriculum goals that strengthen communication skills, can significantly reduce behaviour problems linked to frustration and misunderstanding.

Parents and teachers can support children by simplifying language, using visual aids, modeling social communication, applying evidence-based strategies, and providing clear, consistent instructions. Monitoring language development alongside behaviour allows for timely, targeted support before difficulties become entrenched.

Robust research consistently highlights language difficulties as a key contributor to many emotional and behavioural problems in children. Concrete examples across language domains show how these challenges affect daily life in classrooms, playgrounds, and homes. Recognizing and addressing language difficulties early is essential to reducing frustration-driven behaviours and helping children succeed academically and socially.

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References

Benner, G. J. (2002). Problem behavior in young children referred with language delays: A review. Topics in Language Disorders, 22(4), 55–76. https://doi.org/10.1097/00011363-200210040-00003

Helland, T., Helland, B., & Staver, J. (2022). Long-term associations between early language problems and emotional/behavioral problems in childhood and adolescence: A systematic review. Developmental Psychopathology, 34(4), 1080–1103. https://doi.org/10.1017/S0954579422000194

Jansen, M., O'Brien, C., & Wills, H. (2020). The impact of social communication difficulties on behaviour and mental health in children: A systematic review. Child & Family Social Work, 25(4), 742–752. https://doi.org/10.1111/cfs.12749

Levickis, P., Salt, N., & Wake, M. (2017). Language and social-emotional and behavioural wellbeing in preschool children: A systematic review. International Journal of Speech-Language Pathology, 19(2), 195–208. https://doi.org/10.1080/17549507.2016.1156175

Roy, P., & Chiat, S. (2014). Pragmatic language problems and externalizing behaviours in children: A longitudinal study. Journal of Speech, Language, and Hearing Research, 57(6), 2290–2302. https://doi.org/10.1044/2014_JSLHR-L-13-0219